I am financially illiterate. There, I've said it. Now that my 'fortunes have had a major reversal,' a phrase used by indigent women during the Victorian era, it's time for me to seize this golden opportunity to re-build my finanical life from the ground up. Me, on my own, doing money things....I'm actually a little scared. Well, perhaps 'intimated' would be a more accurate choice of words. I will be accountable to myself and to you, whoever you are. A Year of Common Cents is about saving, spending, repairing, and learning...and doing it all in a fully informed way, using common sense and trusting my instincts enough to say 'No' when I need to. Wish me well as I venture into the dark green abyss of money.
PURPOSE:
The purpose of my blog is to document, on a daily basis, my finanical 'coming of age.' It will contain what I spent the prior day and whether or not in retrospect the purchases were necessary or frivolous, it will contain my efforts in teaching myself how to set up a budget, and then I'll post my actual budget as well as my attempts to stay within it. I'll talk about my Christmas Club account and my Vacation Savings account as well as my investment plan through my job. I'll post when my bills are due and when they are paid. I'll also be posting my attempts to get ONE and only ONE credit card for emergency use - not an easy feat in this day and time...especially after a bankruptcy.
BACKGROUND:
I was never taught anything about money; my dad kept tight control over all money matters and my mom, to this day, still knows nothing about money. I received ten thousand dollars from my ex when he divorced me for the Russian woman; I had no job before the divorce and couldn't find one after it, either. I made my 10K last over a year and was finally able to find a job as a book seller at Books-A-Million ($7 an hour for about 30 hours a week) and at the same time, worked in an English Tea Room as a hostess ($6 an hour for about 20 hours a week) - remember that those hourly rates are pre-tax. I found that even with two jobs at the same time, I didn't have enough money to actually pay my rent and pay my bills so I started using my - yep, you guessed it - credit cards.
Ever the Pollyana, thinking that I would get a good paying job 'any day now,' I maxed those suckers out. When I realized that there was no job in sight (administrative assistants are the last positions to be filled during tough economic times) and there was no money to buy groceries or pay my rent or credit card bills or utilities, I borrowed money from a well known lending company. I asked for $5K and they talked me into $7.5K. Hey - I really thought I could handle the payments they way they explained it to me. In hindsight, I realize I had no idea of my total financial picture.
It wasn't too much longer after that loan that I started having some major medical issues and with no insurance, I was stuck with some shockingly large bills. I ignored them as long as I could but these people never go away. Trust me...pay your bills. They will hound you to your death! They don't care if your intentions are good, they don't care that you can't sleep at night from worrying about how you're going to pay your light bill before it gets cut off. They don't care, nor should they. This is business, people. This is life. I wish they could have understood my position as well as I understood theirs. They performed a service for me and they rightfully demanded payment for it. I received a service from them and wanted to pay them for it but just couldn't, in spite of my efforts.
A year and a half later, I finally got a really good job and moved from small town Goldsboro to big city Raleigh. I was being paid on a weekly basis and at first every thing looked really rosy from a financial standpoint. I was meeting my monthly obligations and had a little money to go out to eat once a week as long as I didn't splurge. Mind you, I still hadn't bought any clothes for work in over a year and a half and my shoes were at least two years old. So, I wasn't splurging on myself. Then the medical bills had to be paid, and my credit card limits were reduced (all at the same time). I knew I was in financial trouble but didn't know where to go or what to do. So one week, I'd pay the electric bill and a few hundred dollars on a medical bill. That would leave me with about $10.00 for groceries and gas until I was paid the next week. The next week, I'd pay a credit card bill or two, and the cable bill. I'd have maybe $10.00 left until the next week. I couldn't save a dime from one week to the next because I was robbing Peter to pay Paul (an old saying - just want to clarify right up front that I never stole a cent from anyone except that one time in grade school {my sister took someone's milk money and I helped her hide the two nickels}. My Mom whipped my butt and that was the end of my life of crime)!
Things started to break that had to be fixed. My daughter needed money for college. I couldn't pay one bill because I had to use that money for something else that had to be taken care of right away. That meant that the next week, I had a double whammy on me. I felt like (and was) such a failure as a person. I mean, really....what 51 year old woman doesn't know how to take care of herself? I was embarrassed by my life, by my situation and I felt dishonest because I couldn't pay my bills for services that had been extended to me in good faith. I simply couldn't keep up. I seriously considered suicide.
I went to a bankruptcy attorney to ask if I should file for bankruptcy or go to a credit counseling center for help. Credit card counseling was never even addressed so I thought bankruptcy was my only option at this point. With a heavy heart, I signed the papers and started the humiliating, painful process. Be prepared, folks, if you are in this situation. You will be treated like the dregs of the earth when you file for bankruptcy. It doesn't matter that you got there through ignorance - you're there. Do you know, to this day, I still don't know the name of the attorney who sat beside me in court? He never introduced himself, never shook my hand, and he never once looked me in the eye. I only dealt with Legal Assistants and Para-Legals who were supercilious at best and downright intentionally demeaning at worst. And I had to take it because I was bankrupt and had no where else to go unless I were to leave my apartment and become a street person.
CONCLUSION:
I'm looking forward to documenting my financial growth starting January 1st. Every day , I'll be posting something about where my finances stand as well as telling you about what it takes for me to get my feet back under me.
I'm looking forward to posting my final blog entry on December 31st, 2010, from my new home. That's what this is all about, Alfie. This is my journey to my rest-of-my-life home.
Please sign on as a follower to track my progress as I work my butt off to meet my goal of buying a small home. I look forward to meeting you all on January 1st.
Until then, a little quote for your consideration:
Money is neither my god nor my devil. It is a form of energy that tends to make us more of who we already are, whether it's greedy or loving. ~ Dan Millman
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